3.  I want to be a person who exercises regularly.

Before I get to my newest topic, I want to talk about the cleanse.

I have been committed to it and, surprisingly, I really like it.  The food actually tastes good and I am not starving.  Today I even woke up without an alarm and if you know me, that hardly ever happens!  I feel good and I look good.  My skin is even more radiant than before.

Last night I made carrot-ginger soup.  Very simple recipe

3 cups chopped carrots
1/2 inch peeled and grated ginger
1 medium onion chopped
4 cups water
2 cups chicken broth

Bring all ingredients to a boil and then simmer for 15 mins or until carrots are soft.  Then put into blender.  Add salt and paper as needed.

I only made this one because it was simple.  Let me tell you, it tasted very good!  I am going to add this one to my recipe book when I am done with this cleanse.

I really have traded in my excuses for will power, but I know that I am still weak.  Give me the grace to see this through sweet Jesus.

Now on to exercising regularly...

I think that this could mean different things to different people.  This is what I define this to mean.  I was blessed to be committed to doing a program called "Insanity" with a dear friend 2 years ago and I liked it.  I saw great results and I liked the challenge.  I am blessed to have a co-worker who is committed to doing this with me starting tomorrow morning.  This will be my exercise for the time being.

The plan is to do month 1 and then reevaluate to see if we should do month 1 a second time before embarking on month 2.  Personally, I like stretching it out to 90 days.  I feel like I have conquered month 1, and it still pushes me, and then I am more ready for month 2 (even though previously we stopped doing insanity before month 2).

So I will be doing this 5-6 times a week.  The program calls for 6 days a week.  I think I can do it but I will not get frustrated and quit if I cannot.  The perfectionist in me needs this buffer.  I will also choose to ride my bike and walk around Gaming more.  Two things have to happen in order for that to happen,  less rain and no more flat tires on my bike.

I ask for your prayers.  My knee is doing well and while I have been strengthening my heel, I am a bit worried about the level of pain and I do not want to injure myself but I know I need to strengthen my legs.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!

2.  I STILL want to be a person without toxins in my body.

"If at first you do not succeed, try, try again."

This has been ringing in my head for a few days now.  If I close my eyes and hear those words, I see a short, stocky cartoon character saying this.  I bet it was from a Disney movie I saw in my younger years... anyway...

So the cleanse did not work.  Well I should rephrase that, it will work, if I follow it.  So you know there is an excuse, I traveled last weekend.  But I must say that I had thrown in the towel a day before that.

So now I am trading in my excuses and starting over.  Today is day one.  I am drinking a blueberry chocolate shake and I have chicken in the oven cooking.  I will be making soup and chili this afternoon.  I have a fridge full of fresh veggies and hopefully a larger helping of will power.

I will say one thing.  I followed it well for 3-4 days and WOW!  I slept better, felt lighter, and lost a good chunk of weight.  This is providing a bit of motivation for me to carry on.

To be honest, I think that doing this alone has got me in a bit of a rut.  I love accountability buddies!  Hey, we were made to live in community right?  I am an extrovert who is deeply in touch with my need and desire for community.

I am reminded of something that the Lord showed me in prayer.  There is a difference between,  "I cannot do this alone," and "I do not want to do this alone." The first you need another human being.  The latter, you need God's grace.

I now call upon God's grace and love to aid me in this.  Oh, and on the feast of St. Anne and St. Joachim, the parents of the Blessed Virgin Mary, I ask for your intercession as well.

More soon...

2.  I want to be a person without toxins in my body.

My favorite dessert are cookies (Oreos and chocolate chip) and I really enjoy Belgian beers.  Boom!  While I do not have either often, when I do, watch out!  My mother spent a long time looking for the perfect chocolate chip cookie recipe.  We found it and I really, I mean really, enjoy them!  There is just something about them that takes me to a happy place.  Oh...and the beer...I live in Europe with great beer only 53 stairs from my apartment.  What a gift.

Now comes the hard part.  While I enjoy those things, I am pushing them to the side to embrace a healthier life.

I have noticed that my body feels better when I embrace a gluten free diet.  I have more energy, clearer skin, I feel lighter, and do not experience tummy problems.  While I have been committed to dodging foods with gluten in them in the past, I have veered from the path long enough to not like the outcome and be convicted to be committed once again.

Where to start...

A friend introduced me to a 21-day cleanse through the Clean program.  She sold me when she said, "You get to eat real food."  I am not a fan of liquid lemon, maple syrup and cayenne paper fasts.  No thank you.  This one sounded a bit more promising.

Ok...so...I tried it yesterday.  To be totally honest, I was on the phone with her a few minutes ago and tried to get her to understand that it was too hard and the food tasted too bad.  I did not win.  She has done the cleanse once before (and even got her hubby to do it too), and is gearing up to do it again.  Her words of love and willingness to walk with me in this helped me to try it once more.

I want to do it, well no I don't but I want the health that comes from doing it, and I honestly think I was looking for an out, and like a good friend, she did not give it to me (thanks Rachie).  The truth is that the food is not too bad.  Even though I cannot get some of the ingredients in Austria, I can substitute and I just need to look a bit harder.  I just have to experiment and see what I like.  Rachie and I enjoy different tastes (obviously, she drinks coffee and I do not touch the stuff).

So tomorrow, I will hold my head high.  I will wake up and make a breakfast smoothie with rice milk, blueberries and raspberries, chia seeds and perhaps some almonds or cashews for a little extra kick.  I am living the high life now!  I will not only swallow the goodness in with I will concoct in the blender but I will take in health and wellness too.

Sweet Jesus, I am going to need you to help me with this one.  This one I can definitely NOT do alone!

Oh, and if I will be discouraged, I will take a deep breath, inhale the Holy Spirit and exhale this truth...I am a person who is smoke free.

1.  I want to be a person who is smoke free. 

If you know me well you know that I have struggled with this one for some time.  I have gone years without a problem but one bad decision and I am hiding behind the building puffing away praying that no one walks by and sees me.  

As I look at the list I have made for myself about the person I want to be, it just seemed logical that this is where I would start.  I feel better when I do not smoke.  I sleep better (and less).  I save money (you better believe that I want to be a person who spends money wisely).  There are many positive reasons.  

So why smoke?  Habit.  I know...I know.  Not a good answer.  Honestly, I would tell people that as bad as it is and as much and I hate smelling like it, I enjoyed it.  Glass of wine, cigarette, good food, great conversation. That was a relaxing evening for me. However, I have found that social smoking has only open the door to smoking more often.  Then before I knew it, I was up to a pack or two a week.  

That is not being fully alive or pro-life for that matter.  

I have stopped before with the encouragement and prayers of friends.  Why is this time different?  I HOPE this time is different because it is a stepping stone to a happier life; one full of energy and life.  Up until this moment I have not looked at being a non-smoker as living in the light or fully alive, but if I think about it, hiding is not living in the light.  

I also chose this one first because I have had some problems with my right knee and left heel.  I want to be a person who exercises regularly, but I am strengthening my body right now (good news, it is working) so that I can get back into a regular workout routine.  I will need that lung capacity.  

I am proud to report that today is 4 weeks totally smoke free and I think I am finally ready to introduce something else into my lifestyle change.  

I feel great!  I sleep better.  I am more free in making plans and spending time with people.  I have saved a chunk of cash.  

How did I do it?  I honestly surrounded myself with people who are not smokers.  I played with friend's children and looked to the Lord for strength when I wanted to be weak.  Now all I have to do is take a deep breath in and out and I fill myself full of life and I smile.  

I am a person who is smoke free.  

I want to be a person who...what does that mean?

I have found myself at an interesting place during my life.  I am 29 and currently living and working in Austria among college students.  Last year the Lord invited me to pack up and move thousands of miles away for a new adventure, an adventure of the heart.

My previous year in Austria was a hard year for me for a number of reasons; some within my control and others not.  Within that there were many celebrations and much joy too.  This summer, I was blessed to return to the US for over a month and while I was there I got to thinking.  Here is what I came up with...

1.  My little heart noticeably aches.  This is not where I thought I was going to be at this point in my life, however, I see my life as truly blessed and led by the Holy Spirit.  I need to refocus the ache towards intimacy with Christ.  

2.  I am returning to Austria for another year (at least).  I have the power to change some things but first I need to reorder my thinking.

3.  There are many changes that will happen in the near further with regards to my job.  I HAVE HOPE...and HOPE does not disappoint.

With the above three mentioned, I got to thinking (and praying) some more and came up with a list.  This is what I call the "I want to be a person who..." list.  This is how I want the world, and my Jesus, to see me.  This is a list of the things that I like in other people and in myself.  Most of these things at one time or another in my life I did, but I have stopped doing them for one reason or another.

It is a positive list.  This is not about what I do not want to be but rather what I want to be.

I invite you to make one as well.

Here are some examples and things I have learned so far...

1.  "I want to be a person who exercises regularly."  What does that mean?  How often?  Be specific. It is ok to have a general idea but it cannot stand alone.  You must define your terms for your own good and so that others can lovingly keep you accountable.

2.  These things take time but this is a LIFE change.  It will be about the journey.  It is not a good idea to introduce more than one thing a week.  Also, you may want to put a hold on adding something new until you have a hold on the previous.  "I want to be a person who is smoke free."  Quitting smoking is a hard process and it involves relearning how to do many things.

3.  Remember it take about 21 days to break a habit.  Some things will take that long.  Do not avoid something difficult because of fear.  In many cases, the most difficult things may be what we need to overcome first to give us the confidence to tackle the other stuff.

4.  Do not do this without Jesus!  In high school, I remember being upset that my parents did not come to my dance meets.  I brought it up to my mother and she looked at me and said, "You never invited us."  Invite Jesus to be a part of this journey with you; ask Him what He wants you to focus on and grow in.  Lean on Him and allow Him to show you just how strong you are.

5.  Use the media for good.  There are many studies that have come out saying that this is good for you or this is bad for you.  If you see something, research it and perhaps incorporate it in your plan.  Use resources on the internet to help you come up with comprehensive plans to change.  For example...I want to be a person who is lives in a high fructose corn syrup free home or I want to be a person who follows and complete's Shawn T's Insanity workout plan.

This is what this blog will focus on.  The journey of my LIFE CHANGE.  I hope to inspire and gain friends for support along the way.